He likes me. all the time.

whoo hoo

i'm beat.


but smiling.


i was too lazy to blog. I spent time scrolling thru the past entries instead and really was glad that i actually started this blogging thing. There are things i don't want to forget. But i take it upon myself to record the good things. The blessings. And the days when i feel happy but have no idea why.

As for the days that sucked and the days when i feel like vomitting from the pain, it's also in this blog. ha. only that they are in code words. only i wld noe. not that i want to purposely remember those, but they put me in good standing and strengthen me for good days to come.


I put my trust in You and Your peace shall reign in me.

Balai rocked.

I want to learn Bahasa Indonesian. I like Indonesia, for all i've seen of it so far la. But i need to devise something such that even if i spend prolonged periods of time there, i can breathe fresh air. Not some PSI 500 kinda haze.

Balai rocked. And You know You're behind it. Thanks. I never thought that an isolated place can bring out such honesty in people and myself too.

Everyone should go to Balai. Alternatively, everyday we should have cell-group worship. Rocks my world. I'm sure Yours too. heh.

ok, this is a bedtime blog. I'm actually not gonna watch soccer. My future lies in my sleep. As u can see, all the lines of thought are not making sense. I need to be awake. Forms C and other tax issues are bursting into my face. Loves it. =) ok, enough nonsense. nite.

By the way, the feet are doing good. The cast is off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But i need to learn how to walk again. To beautiful feeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet.

Jakarta

I do so want to give a nice account of all that i saw and did in Jakarta. But i'm beat. Below are a summary of my 1st day there. =) i will try to put the rest up soon. Tho i'm not hopeful. As i'm headed for tanjong balai on Sat!

Happy Father's Day! Figured we are your favourite children! =)

The Raffles girls

Jeanette - Yvonne - Wenqi -Me - Huiling - Val! Yippeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.
i'm proud like shit to be an RGS girl. And i was really pleased to be meeting up with some of my friends. It's nice to catch up. And remember. And appreciate the fact that we have all grown, all progressed. But some things will always remain.

Pleased i am. =)

.........................................................................

Cheryl and her feet

My well cast feet have been doing a pretty good job carrying me about town. I managed to shop on Saturday and today. i'm pleased. Although the walking did make me feel sore, it wasn't pain. And day by day, they feel stronger. Based on the rough estimate of 4-6 weeks in cast, i have 3 weeks more to go, max. And in the next few weeks, i have already planned a shopping/sight-seeing holiday to Jakarta and a mission trip to Tanjong Balai (an island of Indonesia). Yes, all in cast and those ugly astronaut shoes that some of u have seen.

I'm looking forward.

In the meantime, i can only look on in envy at shoes. I can't even try them on and i don't buy if i can't try. Plus i don't know if the size of my feet will change slightly with the shaving off of some extra bone during the op.

Yesterday i went to Robinson's. It's quite the aunties' shopping paradise. But if u r willing to dig deep and perservere the crowds, there are really some pretty good finds. J actually managed to get leather shoes (2 pairs!), pants and 2 shirts. All for a good deal. It was fun.

Today i went to the library and picked up some really cool books. It's not often i find the stuff i want, especially not at Library@ Orchard as it is well visited by the crowds and the bestsellers always get snapped up. But this time is different. I got my hands on The Undomestic Goddess by Sophie Kinsella, whose books i like to read. I'm pleased. =)


ok, enough of reporting. i'm masking my face now. heh. later gonna watch soccer. Monday is leave day. I feel good. =)

whooo hoooo

i seriously can't think of a better title. i came on purely to post a picture of myself.
new earrings. i miss wearing earrings. and yes, i think this is the winning entry for 'Most bimboic blog'. heh. Yay!

happy me sad me

A very very precious friend of mine returned from London. She called today and i was ecstatic. I virtually screamed in my quiet office. "i miss you!" i screamed silently.


But she bore very sad news. A mutual friend passed away today. I was overtaken by shock. I didn't know what to say next. i felt like it stole every right i had to be overjoyed that a dear friend is back. It didn't feel right to be glad. I was sad.

I wouldn't pretend to be close to her. We are as close as people on the same rugby team. The difference is that i'm the substitute level. She's the player level. But she's also the fun player. I remember her coming up with devious plots to trick opponents. Most of the time, the plots just made everyone laugh and forget the nerves that were jittering before a match. She made substitutes feel like players.

She's dead. And it's sad. I didn't expect to be affected. But i was. And it hurts. It hurts to see a young life ended. And it sucks that i know her. Even though not that well.

I was telling my Dad today (my blood Dad), that i didn't use to think that long life was such a big deal. And he asked me why. And i said that it's cos from the days i was in Sunday school, we were taught that heaven is a wonderful place ( i can even sing the song) and that we should hate the world. But today, i really give thanks for my earthly life.

I came so that you may have life. And life abundant.

tee hee hee

i apologise. I couldn't find a better title. i didn't sleep the entire nite.

This is what i did:

-i altered this unwearable skirt. Now it is wearable. i mite even wear it to the office tm. But trust me, nothing goes with bandages and bulging toes.

-i mended my sister's bag. The zipper came out and i (skilfully) sewed it back. I didn't tell her. so she mite suspect it's the elves.

-i watched about 5 episodes of Desperate Housewives and cried about 3 times cos i was so touched. can u believe just how mad i am?

-i also altered this dress i have. Initially unwearable cos it had this hot pink thing, which i think is major tacky. I replaced it with a black sheer ribbon. I tink it's presentable now so i mite wear it for grad nite.


Quite productive eh? This way, i'l be very sleepy tonite and i'l sleep early and be bouncy and cheery for work tm! Now i'm just waiting for B to call me to tell me "time for church!!!"

I love church. Thank You. Because You live, i can face tomorrow. I take delight in singing Your praises. =)

(thinking about) Running

I had my surgery on 18 May 2006. I can run in 6 months' time. that will be from 17 November 2006. Gasp. I was just watching the replay of a soccer match on TV. And watching the players sweat it out, look so lean, run and look like it's nothing makes me so wanna run. Suddenly, i miss my lunch sessions at the gym.

Why should u run?

Well, if u weigh about 50kg and u run for 30 mins at a jogging pace, u burn about 300 calories.

Let's do some math.

1g of fat = 9 calories
1 kg of fat = 9000 calories

1 lunch session = 40 mins (i take 20 mins to change, bathe and run to and fro the gym)
40 mins of running = 400 calories (approx) (my treadmill says otherwise)
9000/400 = 22.5 lunch sessions to burn 1 kg of pure fat.
22.5/3 = 7.5 weeks (assuming u give up 3 lunches in a week)
7.5 weeks < 2 months.

PURE FAT. wow. think about it. That's the weight of 1 litre of water and the volume of about i dunno how many butters. And there u have it, in PURE FAT. inviting eh? We haven't even considered what a fat-burning machine u will be if u reduce food intake.

OK, this is it. I'm running once my doc says ok.

All this is assuming u run as slowly as me (no one does, i'm a very slow runner). But hey, if u run a little faster, u will burn more.


As u can see, i'm v bored. It's a Saturday and i'm home. Everyone else has plans but here i am. Bah. ok, i'm going to make another skirt, then watch OC.

Run a marathon at 100m pace

That was a phrase J was telling me someone said to him. It left an impression on me. I'm still thinking about it. The fitness required, the determination, the desire.

Who wld have guessed that a lazy Friday (my final MC day) wld be a rather interesting one?

I woke to the alarm ringing. Something i haven't done for the last 4 days. I was due for an appt with my foot doctor. I'm going to see what the feet look like.


Me: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. my feet look so disgusting!

Nurse: ai ya, of course la. It has only been 8 days since the surgery. Even plastic surgery takes longer. But after a while, bomp! (i have no idea what it stands for), u look beautiful!

I was tempted to ask "how u know?", but decided to hold myself.

I continued asking stupids questions like "how come like that huh?" as she took off the existing dressing and put on the new one. Blood oozed out. And i went "eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee" again.

Nurse: ai ya, don't worry! that's old blood!

i can't decided which is worse.

Anyway, where the doctor had made a cut, my skin was held together with black stitches. The skin was creased and very ugly.


My doctor showed me what he did throught the X-ray screen. My big toe was practically sawed apart by him and left to grow back together in time to come. In the meantime, i just have to wear the bandage and when i go out, i have really big shoes.

Happy boredom

Yea, i was really bored. So i played with my camera. Just in case u haven't seen me in a while, this is about what i look like now. And this is my favourite at-home tee. It's my cut-up 'I Love NY' tee. hee.

Blue black feet

Yes, unpretty indeed. And to add, my bandages are getting grey and dirty. Not to mention my toes! ok, i shan't go there. Just now i attempted to post a letter. So i walked to the MRT station. Only to regret it. heh. What was usually a 7-minute brisk walk turned out to be a 25-minute trot. I had to take breaks cos i started to feel my bones protesting. Ok, i'm sorry and will never do it again. (not until the doc gvs the green light at least)

On another note, i had a very nice day. Cos i found out as i was reading the morning paper, that i, having the privilege to be home on a weekday afternoon, can catch American Idol finals live, direct off satellite! yep, so tt cheered me up a bit.

And then, i met Z online and had a very nice chat. Big hug, my dear girl. And ur writings are so mesmerising. In case u wanna do advertising, i think u can. But i think u can do a lot of things. heh.

On a final note, i'm a happy girl cos tonight my cell-group is coming to my place. Cos my beautiful feet are durable enough to travel yet. These pple are so adaptable. Thanks. Ok, i gotta go get dinner. *growl (says the tummy)

The conversation

C1: Hey hey!!!

(C2 looks in my direction)

C1: why? Why so sad?

C2: (downcast eyes) (silence)

C1: Are u bored? i'm soooooooooooo bored.

C2: (continues to look)


Yea, this happens about 7 times in a day. Cos i'm stuck at home and i'm so bored.


Legend: C1- Cheryl; C2- Chippy.

Oh beautiful feet

Yes, in my quest for beautiful feet, and before u tink i'm really the sort who'll throw my life away for beauty, it was on the doctor's advice. The title of this entry can also be 'Oh functional feet". But it sounds weird doesn't it?

Heh.

I admitted myself into Gleneagles on Thursday early morning at 6am. The surgery was scheduled to be at 730am. My dad dropped me as he had a flight to catch at 8am. I didn't expect myself to be so scared. I thought it'l be nothing. I mean, it's not anything has changed. But i felt very alone. And the idea of GA (general anasthesia) scared me further.

I did the necessary, including handing my Letter of Guarantee and Medisave form, and allowed the counter staff to make a copy of my IC. Then, 2 steward-like Bangladeshi guys, nice and politely led me to my room 808. They taught me how to use the locker and how to adjust the bed, then they left me.

I lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling light. I thought i had time to catch a wink. But in like 5 minutes, an auntie-like voice sounded "cheryl...". Well, the nurse had come with operating dress (really just a piece of cloth with strings). So i changed and put my stuff in the locker. And within minutes, i was being wheeled into the theatre. I wanted to cry. I felt like a little girl again.

The threatre is just like what we see on TV. Bright and clinical. Everyone was chirpy and happy, poking fun at one another. (according to B, "it's how Grey's Anatomy!") Seriously, i wouldn't noe cos i don't watch. I kept asking, "Are u my anasthestist?" But most of my answers were like "No, but he's coming soon." "No, he's much shorter".

When he finally came, it was, again like on TV. He had a comforting voice. And spoke more slowly than the rest of the pple in the room. He explained what he was going to do. I asked him if there was any chance that i might sleep forever, i.e. die. And he said no. Then i asked if i might wake up halfway. He said no again and i was satisfied. He then proceeded to 'find my vein' and when he finally came to the final jab, he said, "Cheryl, this is it. Do u drink? What do u drink?"
i said, "erm...i like red wine, Baileys..yea, that's about it." "Ok, this is going to feel like 4 red wines with 2 Baileys ok?" "Ok."

And then i felt it. Then, like some drunk shit, i said "oooooooooooh. i feel it now. I'm floating..." Then i shut my eyes.


I as i was being wheeled out of the threatre. I recognised the bright lights. And then the pain hit. It was so so bad. I don't even know how to describe it.

I fell back to sleep under the influence of the drug.

I next awoke to an overwhelming pain that made me cringe as if i was having spasms. I was on a drip that administered painkiller constantly. The surgeon came by, saw my state. And instructed the nurse to increase the dosage. The painkiller attempted to reduce the pain. It also left me weak and groggy. En, B, P and D came by to see me. I felt so loved. But i was so weak, i could only open my eyes a bit and fall back to sleep, with my mouth wide open.

The nurse urged me to eat. and i wanted to kill her. Cos i was not able to. The painkiller had reduced all my muscles to zero. It rendered me unable to musticate my food. Or even swallow. I could only give thanks that all the oral painkillers were paired with anti-gastric pills.

By the middle of the next day, i was much better. Pain visited in momentarary pricks that brought tears, but the threat to kill was much less likely. i was also able to be taken off the drip. I could eat too. But hospital food is tasteless. And to add to my inactivity, i didn't really have reason to eat.

I stayed another night. I was not able to move an inch off my bed. I depended on the bedpan to pee. I had no shit. Perhaps i was truly scared shitless. ha. It was a Saturday that i was discharged. My sis came to bring me. It felt good going home. Cos i was starting to feel bad for troubling everyone to come and visit me/ take care of me.

Now i'm home. With a grand total of 5 days of MC. I am bored to tears. I actually want to work. But this actually gives me time to blog. And laze around. And sleep. Now my feet looks like this:


Yea, the toes are swollen from the water retention. I haven't seen the work of the surgeon. I only get to this Friday. Can't wait. Will show u soon. yippee.

Chippy

Chippy is my black furry dog with an insatiable appetite and the saddest, sweet eyes. I came home to an excited dog, as usual. J got on with his usual greetings. and a little more.

J: yo Chips, wassup.

(pauses)

wow. you have the amazing ability to make the whole place smell like you.

Chippy: (silence)

We proceed upstairs. And Chippy races along, overtaking us. (He likes to be first, then wait at the top of the stairs) Unfortunately, he trips.


J: How is it possible that you trip when u have 4 legs?

random sia

well well, i've been wanting to blog for the longest time. In some odd way, it's a form of release. And it is fast becoming a luxury because of its rarity. I know it sounds unbelievable. But in the office, i'm not comfy with blogging. And when i get home, i don't like to find myself staring at some screen since i've done it for an entire day.

Here i am. at 6.03 am on a Sunday morning. i blame the ice milk tea i had today at 3pm. Yes, tea has that effect on me. I dunno. it's not all the time. i suspect it's some combination with milk and sugar that sends me bouncing off the walls. And yes, i was one happy girl today.

I had planned to wander about town on my own. But in the end, the plans were pleasantly foiled as i ran into my sis and LK. Ended up wandering about town with them. And chatting to my heart out. For all the amount i talk, i sometimes miss talking. Can u believe that?

Came home to watch the Elections results. exciting stuff. Seriously, i never used to think so much about our government. But with this round of elections being one of the more hotly contested ones, i find myself being interested to read more, hear more. Sad to say, i don't have many opinions regarding the government that i can call my own. But i'm learning, and thinking.


I remember on some random Monday morning, i was trotting to work, rather happily. Before u all think i am mad, do nothing at work, or simply a workaholic, it's not the case, i assure u. I'm sometimes happy for no good reason. I don't burst into smiles or some shit, i just secretly smile to myself. It's like, if my heart could wink, that's what it did. A cheeky one. (I understand that i'm sounding mad)

So i told myself, that i have to blog about this, lest i forget that such good days have been bestowed on me. i will sing of His mercies, forever i will sing!

On another more personal note, my Japanese roomie, M, has returned to Japan. Initially, it was odd returning to an empty room. Cos i had gotten used to coming in and saying "hey". Now i don't. I still change in my bathroom even tho i don't have to anymore. It had been a great learning experience. While i didn't learn any Japanese, i did learn more about Japanese people. More importantly, i had found a friend. I don't actually think i'm an easy person to live with. And i didn't expect myself to find it easy to live with someone who started out being a stranger. But i did. And it was a smooth and pleasant experience. Now with the extra bed moved out and half my wardrobe returned, my room feels more spacious. Welcome all who wanna drop by and hang out!

Another meaningless thing i have to update u all about is my rebonded hair!!! i did it. finally. i've been thinking about it for the longest time. But didn't do it cos i didn't fall into the catagory that was commonly named 'candidates for re-bonding'. What i mean is, many people i sought opinion from felt that i didn't need to as my hair was not wavy. But now i look neater. The change is not drastic. But i actually look like i bother to comb my hair. Isn't that great?

Finally, i need to buy a pair of gold shoes to match the gold handbag i had recently acquired. In case u think i am Miss Ar-Piang, i'm not ok! my handbag is a matt, light gold shade. Very nice. Got chance i show u. And cos my bags NEED to have matching shoes, the urgent task is to get gold shoes. Perhaps Monday i'l go and get. Today i did see stuff i like. Just didn't buy. i wanted to be sure. hee.

You have come to the end of my blog entry. In case u are wondering, this is my bimbo outlet. Is it not obvious enough? heh. Thanks for entertaining me. i'm most pleased! =)

Early morning Monday....blues?

my sis returned from Hong Kong on Monday. I mean, really late on sunday nite. I crept into her room at 730am. A time considerably late for most, but my sis was still snoozing.

me: eh, u not working today meh?

sis: working..

me: wah. then u don't wan to wake up ar?

sis: waking up....

me: wakey wakey!!

sis: ai ya...

me: it's time to work! whoo hoo! time to work time to work! ( i start prancing around her room in my most graceful ballerina steps.)

sis: shhhhhh.....

me: but it's time to work! it's great to work!!!!!!!!!!!! (in an opera voice, Singapore Idol reject-style)

sis: GET OUT!



seriously, that's what younger sisters are for. You hardly see them (i only see my sister in church on Sundays. And yes, we live next to each other), and when u do, u should scream at them. All because they innocently tried to get you psyched up for Monday work. Talk about family ties.....(huge dramatic sigh)